The Final Countdown to your big day
So the countdown has started….
Here are some of Tom and Nikki 's handy hints for planning your Wedding, Commitment Ceremony or fab Gay party

12 - 6 months to go
6 months to go
5 months to go
4 months to go
3 months to go
2 months to go
1 month to go
1-2 weeks to go

12- 6 months to go

•  Congratulations to the two of you on deciding to get hitched, whether it is going to be a Traditional Wedding, Commitment Ceremony a Gay celebration or a bespoke minimal day for just the two of you!

•  Set a date for the ceremony, a memorable date to you two, a sunny summer day or a winter wedding like ours, so you don't have to think about whether it will be cold or rainy! (The week before Christmas and we still had beautiful sun!!)

•  Plan a guest list, a really hard thing to narrow down, who do you really want to invite to share your special day?

•  Check out possible venues, a country mansion, a village hall, a grassy glade or fly away to the Caribbean !

•  Now you know where and when, you can work out a budget, and then maybe reconsider the guest list and the venue!

•  Decide how to beg, borrow or save your Wedding budget

•  Order some ‘Save the Date' cards. These are great for telling all your friends and family to keep the date clear when your Wedding is still someway off. It also warns everybody in case the date clashes with the World Cup, or peak holiday times.

•  Start buying Wedding magazines and making a scrap book of Wedding dress styles, contemporary designs, colours, original themes, bespoke cakes, handmade stationery, anything that grabs your eye.

•  Start checking out Wedding websites, another valuable source for finding your Wedding favours, invitations, photographer www.davidennisphotography.com or tracking that particular ribbon you want! Try www.onlybrides.com

•  Check out local Bridal shows for local designers, original ideas, bespoke jewellery, great venues, contemporary caterers, Civil Partnership venues, DJ's, fab florists, bands and so much more.

•  Your catering? What do you want, a formal meal or a buffet? We did without a seating plan and had a free-for-all arrangement and our favourite takeaway laid on a huge spread with various Thai and Malay curries to suit most tastes, and bangers and mash for the less brave. Surprisingly the curries were the most popular with all age groups and most of the older guests had both, people still talk about it!

•  Start your Wedding fitness regime, trim off a pound a month from now on, and loose a dress size or two!

•  Think about your dream holiday for your honeymoon, a once in a lifetime trip. Lazing on miles of white sand in the sun? Everyone is different, what can you come up with? We spent four weeks backpacking around the vineyards in Argentina and Chile , only managed 22 vineyards…. But we also conceived our daughter Amelie, a fab memento of a wonderful honeymoon!

Start thinking about a handy booklet to send either with your invitations or upon receipt of the RSVP from your guests. It could include your pressie list, maps of how to get to the venues, local accommodation, info on local transport, taxis etc. How about a ‘Fun things to do locally' to entertain guests the day before, or ‘Best local pubs' guide?

6 Months to go

•  Book your Church, Registry office, or licensed venue for your Civil Partnership, Commitment Ceremony or Wedding day.

•  Have you sent out some Save the Date cards yet?

•  Put an announcement in your local paper, tell the world, and shout it from the roof tops!

•  Order your Wedding Stationery. There are so many styles available, do you want something traditional, fun n' funky, ever so contemporary, original handmade or a bulk buy from ebay? You can get your daytime and evening invites first and think about co-ordinating RSVP's, a good way to remind everyone to let you know if they can make it. Later you can order your menus, Order of Service, place settings, thank yous, table planners, and table names.Arrange some insurance before you pay any deposits.

•  Choose your Best men, bridesmaids or Best women. We found it too hard to choose, so we had 3 Best men and 5 Best women, which made life so much easier and took a lot of pressure off us sorting out the stag and hen nights!

•  Sort out your dress- Do you want an off the peg number, an original, bespoke designer dress or a luxury, handmade diamond encrusted creation!

•  Book your florist, caterer, bands, photographer etc and confirm the bookings in writing.

5 months to go

•  Book your honeymoon.

•  Choose outfits for your groom, Best men and bridesmaids etc.

•  Order that delicious, gorgeous cake.

•  Have you sorted out your bouquet, buttonholes, posies, or corsages?

•  Have you sent some Save the Date cards yet?

4 months to go

•  Make a Wedding pressie list, a chance to own some of those luxury things you've always wanted, or that original painting, that groovy set of saucepans or like us you could have contributions to the cost of your honeymoon and 100 bottles of red wine! Our friends know us well!!

•  Check out the Post Offices range of personalised stamps, with your own photo or picture to send on your invitations and thank yous. They are only £14.95 for 20 and really personalise your invites or thank you cards, and so many people kept ours! http://www.royalmail.com/portal/rm/content2?catId=3800007&mediaId=3800008

•  Think about some entertainment for your younger guests. We had a face painter who also made balloon animals and gave the parents a break.

•  Choose your rings.

•  Check your passports for that fab honeymoon. Do they have at least 6mths left? If not get down to the Post Office quick! http://www.postoffice.co.uk/portal/po/jump2?catId=19300207&mediaId=19300211

•  Select your hymns and readings, convince your friends to read something out, and then get it all organised so you can order your Order of Service, as they take a lot of work!

•  Have you thought about sending your invitations to overseas friends and relatives early so they can book their flights?

3 months to go

•  Send out your Wedding Invitations. They are s'posed to go out 6-8wks before the Wedding. If you are worried that it will clash with the Six Nations/ World Cup/ Grand Prix/ Stamp Collectors annual convention, then send out a Save the Date card. Or send your Invitations earlier than 6-8wks!

•  Order your Order of Service booklets, Menus and Thank you cards

•  Get your vaccinations and visas organised

•  Get planning your hen and stag nights, hopefully your Best men and women can be relied upon to organise your dream do! Or start dropping hints, especially to those best men!

2 months to go

•  Do you need to sort out credit cards in your married name? Have you decided what your married name will be? His surname, your surname, double barrelled? You have so many choices! I have kept my maiden name, after 36 years I was very attached to it, and I liked having an unusual name and Tom wasn't bothered about names, our names were too long to be double barrelled. Some of our older relatives still refer to me as Mrs Collins, and he sometimes gets referred to as Mr Golesworthy… http://www.deedpollsonline.co.uk/AWomansRightsUponMarriage.html Then what name will the kids have!! Another can of worms for you to discuss.

•  Buy a guest book for everyone to sign on the big day (but unlike us don't leave it behind at the Registry Office, whilst being the last service of the day, meaning it's all locked up when you eventually realise…)

•  Think about gifts or flowers for bridesmaids, Best men, and all the people who have helped you get to your Wedding day.

•  Start hassling all those people who haven't replied with their RSVP. From experience and chatting to brides whilst we are organising their stationery, there are always some who don't and they are always the groom's best mates!

•  Start sending out Thank you cards as soon as you receive presents, it will make life a lot simpler later on when the honeymoon is over!

1 month to go

•  Sort out something ‘old, new, borrowed and blue', it can be quite fun and I'll bet Mum or Gran have something lovely for you to use.

•  Reconfirm all your bookings.

•  Book some time off work for a pampering session, or a weekend away with your Best woman!

•  Have a final dress fitting

•  Chase those RSVP replies again.

•  Prepare and practice your speeches, bullet points help and don't, like Tom expect to remember it off the top of your head, cos as soon as you stand up and see all those faces watching you and expecting giggles galore, your mouth will go dry and your mind completely blank!

•  Finalise your table planner and place cards with your wonderful stationery designer!

1-2 weeks to go

•  Order your Travellers cheques or currency. Remember that most airports have ATM's so you can always get some instant cash as soon as you arrive. We always do, and as yet haven't found an airport without a cash point. Take your credit cards too.

•  Have you got your Order of Service yet? Your place settings, menus?

•  Wear in your Wedding shoes, I wish I had!

•  Confirm final numbers with your caterer.

•  Make a useful list of important phone numbers for the Wedding day. Local taxis, doctors, the caterer, the band etc.

•  Finalise the music with your DJ or band. What will your first dance be? (Or will you skulk in the kitchen and hope everyone forgets like me?) Have you chosen all those great songs guaranteed to get your mates strutting their stuff?

•  Have your final rehearsal for the big day.

•  Pack for your honeymoon.

•  Get the rings to the Best man.

•  Pamper, get a manicure, relax, and get ready to enjoy one of the best days of your life!!

•  Our final recommendation from talking to brides, grooms and from our own experience, try and meet up with your new spouse regularly during the big day, there will be so many people to chat to all day, it's hard to get a few minutes to say hello to your new husband/ wife, so try and make the time!